Mesmerizing and awkwardly infantile are the feelings and the times when God decides to slap you on ALL cheeks of the face and ass and says it’s time! IT IS time to move into NOT an idea you had of yourself BUT INTO YOU. “…Qouth the Raven, Nevermore…” Nevermore will I entertain the idea that I can never be a dead lifeless body roaming aimlessly in life driven by my fears, worries, and insecurities. I chose to shed the zombie demeanor and awaken to the life I came here to live. SO LET’s LIVE IT SHALL WE! This includes accepting ALL of it and letting go of the idea of how I should be and not be, but rather just being and moving through the moment with grace and love.
Those fearful large black wings and mysterious sounds of crowing from the depths of our souls are crying for illumination.
Death crying from the trees.
Painful roots sprouting in our bodies that we ignore and shy away from.
These are the weeds/blessings we constantly need to examine, pluck and uproot from OUR garden of LOVE. I can only speak for myself, although I know the fray of those who can relate. We fear the challenges of the day and what they could lead to. We fear the moments of possible rejection, where life feels like it ceases and molds into that graveyard we always worried would manifest if we ever pursued the road less traveled. At the end we see our tombstone that reads, Here lies the individual(s) who took a chance on love and passion and failed. They failed miserably. Security, safety, expected structure is what rules the day and the times! Dismiss any passionate idea involving the unknown. These are the whispers in our head blowing from the fearful egoic wind. Therefore why even try to take that road? This fear leads into inaction, stagnation, and immobility, which creates a death from within.
That tombstone is our fear of the death. If we think of the death, the supposed failure, of course what is manifested is the death, the immobility, the inaction, the working dead, the zombie demeanor towards life. The fear of failure, which is now quite cliché to describe this process of inaction and unwelcoming as the complexity of why we do the things we do or lack thereof can’t be summed down to one single fear of something undefined!
No one FAILS! The IDEA to succeed or fail is the seed, water, and soil for feeling, energy, and behavior of the “FAILURE.”
FAILURE is living. It is being. It is all just as it is and as it will always be.
Moments in space and time
that we try to define
in order to control the feelings of pain and love rather than facing the sun and just feeling the immense rapture of the Divine from above.. or within?
Tend, to cause the illusion to become so very real.
Our cells constantly resurrect in our physical bodies minute by minute. Why can’t our ideas of WHO WE ARE do so too? We are always going to go through change that is foggy and difficult. That is lovely and poignant. Change that is wonderful and everlasting. Change that is deep and painful. Change that is change.
I can’t be a zombie anymore, but of course with awakening oneself, the obstacles, the clarity, the paradoxical truths of what it means to live also get awakened. Leaving the job was the first honest and scary truth for living a more fulfilled passionate life. The second, leaving the longterm relationship. Third, (all great things come in threes), deep intense (idea to be abiding) love for another, to a then profound healing heartbreak, was the unrelenting next “matter” to jolt me into breath again.
Whether we are continuing to be apart of the Working Dead or choosing to move into our lives fully committed to our souls journey, and ourselves I say as long as we are moving with grace and love, then fear, inaction, and maybe even…zombies will stay limited in the obscure dark and scary graveyard. Or not. Who knows? Who cares? It is whatever!