October 27th, 2014
I haven’t been writing, but I am glad to be today. My emotional state has been rocky for the past few weeks. Transformation is a brewing. Coming across a new book called The Book of Life written by J. Krishnamurti has me on my knees. Of all the books non fiction or fiction, scriptures, lyrics, verses, articles, meditative mantras, I would have to say this book is changing the way I process thought and emotion.
The book is broken down into the days of the year. Each day has a title and a passage from the month that holds an overarching theme.
The month of Octobers theme is TIME | PERCEPTION | BRAIN | TRANSFORMATION.
Know the feeling when you’re always asking questions to the Universe and you pick up a book and read a passage and can’t believe your questions have been answered? Well, reading this everyday is like that feeling everyday. It’s so powerful; my heart aches with joy. The transcendence of past pain into revelation and abundance tears at the walls of my heart. No words can really describe what I am going through, but I will try and break it down from a passage I read recently entitled,
“A Fresh Mind.”
October 17th… “I think constant endeavor to be something, to become something is the real cause of the destructiveness and the aging of the mind…” These words slapped me right between my eyes and knocked me out cold. Not only because that’s what has been on my mind since of course I left my job recently “ to pursue and discover my passion,” but also because I didn’t want to hear it. I tried to twist the words into something that I wanted to hear until I came across this passage…
“There is a Quietness”
“You listen to something, and your mind immediately reacts with its knowledge…its past memories…either you are listening with a conclusion or you want an answer and you are impatient…You can only listen when the mind is quiet. In that interval, if you observe, there comes clarity. That is the new brain…”
The passages through October go on and on breaking down the formal system of thought, things, ideas, beliefs I knew but never practiced and never heard interpreted in the words I NEEDED to hear in order to assess, process, and form new ways of absorbing my presence.
I am on rocky turf now. My part time work isn’t what I dream of doing, but what I dream of doing stays in the confines of my dream world.
The desires of the heart are very different from the desires of the mind. The flesh is here for us to feel and experience. Maybe the mind is here for us to break free from the limiting flesh and absorb the expansiveness of the abundant spirit. Can it be that cognitive dissonance is just what we need to escape the shackles of habitual thought and routine?
Mixing black and white, we get grey.
I am here to be. So is the fly.
The arrogance our minds construct for us to believe that we’re here for something more than BEINGNESS is apart of the illusion. I smiled at a flower today. Drove to the canyon and discovered I was not teaching today. I connected with a friend. Spoke to my Mother and watched some funny and dramatic television. I normally judge and rate my day for identification and measurement on how close I am to my dreams that mostly involve acceptance and validation from strangers and material objects. I did not do this today.
Today I am writing with my heart and living in my flesh. Today I am smiling at me and it feels good. Today, I may have just used my new brain.